In the manual "Finding Happiness in America", I describe the research that shows happiness levels in America have remained
stagnant over the past 50 years while our living standards have risen. Are we
forgetting that we all possess the ingredients for happiness? Even though scientists continually
search for a genetic link to suggest some may embody a greater propensity for
happiness than others, the fact remains that joyfulness resides in each of us.
If your DNA threads lead to a propensity for downheartedness, than you will
simply have to burrow deeper to unearth the happiness within. It's there,
waiting for you to unearth it!
In 36 years
of counseling youth and adults, I’ve witnessed happiness or glumness dwelling
within both the healthy and ailing, rich and penniless, smart and dull, and
handsome and ugly. The happier clients discovered that happiness must be
learned and practiced daily or it will wither away. They took responsibility
for their own contentment and didn't allow politics, the government, their
boss, social attackers and gossip, or a myriad of other external events to
upset them for very long.
People who
remain in high spirits perform to the best of their abilities on the home
front, in the community, and at the office or shop. They deliver more than what
life pays them to do and often reach beyond their own selfish needs to extend
small courtesies that inspirit the lives of others. They dream dreams, set
worthy goals, remain committed to paying the price to achieve them, and enjoy the
gallant journey toward reaching them.
Regardless
of your genetic weavings, past experiences or current situation, you possess
the ingredients for happiness. Your road to happiness must be an active process
that's practiced each day. Life doesn’t devote itself to making you happy, so
by design it is the manner in which you travel through life that makes you so.
If you passively sit back and wait for happiness to arrive, you will never
encounter it…even if it knocks on your door, which it rarely does.
The happiest
people I've met laugh through life’s little irritations, regardless of their circumstances
or genetic make-up. Zig Ziglar wrote about a man who bought a lemon of a used
car and drove it back onto the used car lot a week later and said to the upbeat
and persuasive salesman, “Could you please tell me about this car again?
Sometimes I get so discouraged with it!”
Yes, disappointing
things will happen to you and fairness, peace and justice will not always go
your way, so you need to be encouraged... like Zig Ziglar. Happiness is not the
absence of problems- it's how you deal with them. You will only be as happy as
you make up your mind to be, so don't allow traumatic life events or
ill-humored DNA strands inherited from your ancestors to rob you of the power
to discover your good side. Don't travel through life with the gusto of the
cruise director on the Titanic...you can choose not to.
I know you
can, because I've counseled many people who have found happiness despite past
upsets and current injustices. Traumatic events licked the red off their candy
canes, but they discovered the free, miracle drug which has no bad side
effects…laughter! They didn’t purchase it at the local pharmacy, but unearthed
it from deep inside themselves.
It's a researched
fact. Laughter can ease pain, banish tension and worry, and liberate cloudy
minds to think more clearly. You can “condition” yourself to laugh at life...and
to be happy. Begin the journey now!
Robert Morton, M.Ed., Ed.S. has retired from his
positions of school psychologist and adjunct professor
in the School of Leadership and Policy Studies at Bowling Green State
University. He is author of the book "Finding Happiness in America."
